Sunday, July 8, 2012

a monumental day

Well, I don't even really know where to start.............(big smiles today)

Today has been a huge day for me in lots of ways. I feel like Im finally leaving my past life behind in this small, not so great, apartment. Which Ive lived in since May of 2007. Yep, thats a long ass time.
I knew it was gonna be a big change, and I wanted it to be. But I guess Im just surprised on how GREAT it REALLY does FEEL to get outta here. Not that Im moving in to the Trump tower by any means, but you know what???
It might as well be!!!
The only reason I'm awake right now, is because my lil man is sick. Im thinking its nerves, but I'm just not sure. He's been throwing up on and off for about two hours.
See, my dad came over today and helped us get ALL the crap outta the apartment except for bedding, cold food, dishes, the laptop and one TV.
Mike is moving that stuff tomorrow, while I run to the airport with grandma. I'll explain that, in a minute.
So, we get THREE truck & trailer loads of crap to the trailer today, and when we get back to the apartment, Sam says.......
Mommy you took my room away!!!
Im like, UMMM, its at the NEW house!! Dont you remember seeing all your stuff there?
hes not getting it.
He just got himself more and more upset. So I played a movie for him (tried) to watch on the laptop. Then he just walked across the room and started throwing up!!!!
Ohhhh jeez.
Poor thing even tried cleaning up the 'mess'
Im like, thats what mommys are for, to clean up when your sick. Of course its traumatizing to puke at three yrs old, so I was very assuring.
Anyways, here I sit, waiting for the next "bout"
And, we are supposed to go in the morning, to pick up my aunt and cousin from southern california at the airport, grandma will be here at 7am.
Man, work is gonna seem like a break next week. LOL

My uncle (grandma's son) died, at 39 of prostate cancer. The aunt thats coming here, was his wife, and his daughter. His other daughter is driving up with her husband, and they are 'due in' monday or tuesday. She has two lil girls, so sam will finally meet his two cousins, from california!!
Grandma wants to have Sam over most of next week, which works out GREAT, so we can get unpacked, ummmm well so mike can get us unpacked while Im at work, LOL
Mike is LOVING the fact we have a dishwasher now.
We haven't had a dishwasher the entire time we've been together!!! (almost 12 yrs) Our 9 year wedding anniversary is coming up on July 26th. I cant hardly believe it.

Mike found a couple things of mine, and I did too for that matter, from my 'past' today. You know, it really didnt even phase me. I think this 'move' is so huge for me, that it just couldnt bring me down today. I dont think anything could.
There really is life after drugs, and its pretty freaking great these days.
Also, today, while I was laughing with my friend until my stomach hurt,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
I realised Im "me'' again.
When I was younger, I laughed at everything, all the time. Everyone always asked me, where do you buy your weed, cuz it must be good. And this was way before I ever smoked pot!!!!
Im like that again, or getting there.
Mike's even noticed it. Since I ''frazzled" more easily these days, well just like I used to before the opiates took over, he said I'm the person he fell in love with again.
Not just the part of getting overwhelmed ,,,, its my ability to find humor in any/every situation, and my borderline OCD,,,, all of it, coming back like a flood.
See, for about eight years, I had a bad case of the 'fuck-its' I think. Pardon my french, but that's the best way I can put it.
I didnt care about much of anything, except, ONE thing. And I didn't laugh much, if I did, it was mostly fake.

My best buddy watched Sam most of the day for us today, so we could  get moved. He had so much fun with her and her kids, he was more than worn out when we got home. That was so great,,, we got way more done than we could have with me chasing him around.
My mom took Sam yesterday,,, for the same reason. My dad borrowed a truck and 8' utility trailer to help us move most of the stuff today, which was really great. My dad and I even got along, we didn't argue once. I couldnt believe it!!! (lol) My brother & his girlfriend who live near portland, were here for part of the weekend and helped us a lil too.
It's like everyone is pitching in to help. We sure needed it.

Oh yea, and my teeth.
So, I cut my stitches out Friday night. Yep, Im a bad ass.
(It really wasnt that hard, honestly)
The stitches being out has made a huge difference though. Grandma told me they'd feel like a 'part of me' soon, and she was right, they are starting to feel that way now.  After friday, the 'stick' better, and don't move around nearly as much. I even ate alot today, chewed and everything!! wooooo hoooooo for me!!!
That makes me more confident about it too. I do still have a couple of sore spots, but it IS improving.
Thankfully, its not constantly on my mind 24/7 now that I have dentures. Thats nice, to forget they are there.

Today definitely makes up for that day from hell I had a few weeks ago!!!
I'm ready for the next catastrophe now, but theres always hope there wont be one.
Thanks for all your support,
and reading my rants, emotional baggage, etc, etc, etc, etc,,
Make every day count, you never know when its your last,
or someone you loves last.

hope you all had a great Independence Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We sure did!!!!

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